This is a video of me doing yoga naked. Please read before watching...#nsfw
For most of my life I have struggled with body issues. Im 43 years old. When I was 20 I went through a phase where I ate laxatives (the chocolate kind, of course) and drank slim fast (strawberry) to lose weight. I couldn't make myself throw up because I don't have much of a gag reflex. Then I saw Oprah interview Whitney Houston who confessed that she ate laxatives to lose weight. Bingo!! I remember the first time I looked in the mirror and I saw my ribs. I thought, now if I could only lose this belly.
When I was 21 I found yoga and it literally saved my life. I started to develop a more loving relationship with my body. But there are still periods in my life when I won't even think of looking in the mirror without my clothes. I've told myself that I don't like to practice yoga naked-- not even at home-- because it's uncomfortable, you know, *things* get in the way. But when I get quiet and real honest I have to come to terms with the reality that I don't like to practice yoga naked because there is still a part of me that doesn't like my body.
This isn't just my struggle. Many of us struggle with shame of our bodies. Shame of all kinds. I have been on a crusade to eliminate shame-- my own and others-- for many years. And I will continue to do so probably for as long as I live.
This video is a coming out, of sorts, and another step on the way to wholeness.
*music: Max Richter - Departure